Chalk and Cheese
by HeyMrsPotter
Summary: Fred and George Weasley are twins, but the similarities stop with their looks. George has grown tired of Fred's constant pranks and decides to get his own back. Will he succeed or will his plan backfire?


**This is a parody story about Fred and George, just for fun! **

Fred and George Weasley were identical twins. When it came to physical appearance, there was barely a freckles difference between them. Molly Weasley had began the tradition of knitting jumpers that bore the initials of her children, when the twins were born and her poor husband could seldom tell the difference between the two boys. However, with each year they grew older, the differences in their personalities became painfully obvious. Now, at fifteen years old, they were like chalk and cheese.

Fred Weasley was a prankster, a joker and all-round comedian by his own standards. He and best friend, Lee Jordan spent their days plotting and executing pranks on their latest victim: much to the amusement of their peers, and peeves the poltergeist. Fred was more concerned with dreams of one day opening a joke shop than classes at Hogwarts much to the annoyance of the Professors.

George, on the other hand, could always be found in the library, hidden amongst a pile of books and homework. He was the first to arrive at each class and the last to leave. His homework was always completed early and much longer than required. He sat at the front of the class and hung on every word of the teachers. At the beginning of fifth year George, and his mum, were delighted to find he'd been made a prefect.

Unfortunately for George, the quiet life with his books he so desperately craved was always being obstructed by Fred and his jokes. He had lost count of the number of times he had asked Fred not to involve him in his silly pranks but the pleas always fell on deaf ears.

Only last week, Fred had decided it would be an excellent idea to swap his and George's History of Magic essays the morning they were due in. He had taken advantage of George's momentary distraction in the form of Head Boy and George's favourite brother, Percy arriving at breakfast and quickly changed the names with a wave of his wand. George was horrified when his essay was returned with a large, red 'D' at the top of the page and even more so when he heard whooping noises from the back of the class and saw Fred showing off his own homework with a large 'O' on it. George immediately figured out Fred's trick; one look at the opening sentence of the essay in his hand confirmed it. Of course, Professor Binns hadn't noticed; he thought Fred and George were the same person. George had to march to the back of the class, snatch the paper out of Fred's grasp and reverse the spell.

Then there was the time Fred took dozens of library books out in George's name and didn't return them on time. Madam Pince had frog-marched George out of the Great Hall at dinner and all the way to the portrait of the Fat Lady before demanding he go and get the books from his dormitory. It took several minutes for George to calm the old librarian down enough for her to tell him which books he had supposedly 'stolen'. George went straight to Fred's trunk and found the books there. It took him a long time to gain Madam Pince's trust back after that, despite repeatedly telling her that it was Fred who had taken the books out.

These were to name but a few of the pranks Fred had played on George, not to mention him always switching George's potion ingredients when he wasn't looking, hiding his wand and having Peeves follow him around singing rude songs.

The final straw for George came when he woke one morning to find his prefect badge gone. He jumped out of bed and looked on the floor around his bedside table; thinking it had simply fallen on the floor. Panic began to rise, George ran to each of the other three beds in the room waking the boys he shared a room with: Lee, Fred and Max. Each told George, very groggily, that they had not seen his badge. Knowing his brother well enough not to believe him, George tore the bed sheets from Fred and demanded he turn out the pockets of his pyjama bottoms. Fred obliged before snatching back his duvet and telling George when he found his badge he could shove it where the sun doesn't shine.

George spent the rest of the day, badgeless and grumpy, still accusing Fred, who protested his innocence. After dinner, he headed to the second floor for his patrol duty and counted down the minutes until he could return to his dormitory to search for his badge once more.

As soon as he climbed through the portrait hole later that night, George heard some sort of disturbance in the common room. He looked over to the fire where the noise was coming from and saw two first year boys clutching at something hanging from their mouths, a figure was standing over them; one that George recognised too well.

"What in the name of Merlin is going on?" he asked as he approached the scene.

On closer inspection, George realised the things hanging from the mouths of the first years were their tongues, larger than they should be and expanding.

"FRED!" George bellowed. "What have you done?! Fix them, NOW!"

"Calm down, Percy junior," Fred laughed, "I'm on it."

He took a small green bottle from his pocket and poured three drops of the contents on to each tongue, they instantly shrank back to their usual size, relief washed over the young boys faces. George opened his mouth to scold his brother, but paused when he noticed something on the front of Fred's robes.

"Is. That. My. Prefect. Badge?" he said through gritted teeth.

"Er..." Fred glanced down at the badge pinned to his chest.

"_Your_ badge?" one of the boys spoke to George.

"Yes. MY badge," George replied, not looking at the boy but glaring at Fred.

"But, he's the prefect, isn't he?" asked the other first year.

Realisation dawned. George could feel his face and ears filling with blood, turning red as anger rose in him.

"YOU PRETENDED TO BE A PREFECT SO YOU COULD TRY OUT YOUR LITTLE TRICKS? ON A FIRST YEAR?!" The eyes of every person in the common room were now on George.

Fred backed away, "George, calm down, there's no need to shout. I knew what I was doing, the ton-tongue toffees are harmless-"

"THAT'S NOT THE POINT! You've gone too far this time, Fred. Too far.

Twenty points from Gryffindor, and detention for a week!" ignoring the groans from everyone and Fred's protests, George stormed over to his brother, removed the badge from his robes and went to his dormitory without another word.

Still fuming with Fred, George found himself unable to sleep. He couldn't help but feel that the deducted points and detention would have no effect on Fred; they wouldn't change his behaviour. What Fred needed was a taste of his own potion. A plan quickly began to form in George's head; he was about to take on the role of prankster.

The next day, George stayed behind after potions to implement the first stage in his plan. He had told Professor Snape that he wanted to stay behind to perfect the shrinking solution they had been working on that lesson. Snape told George that as long as he left the dungeon immaculate he couldn't care less. He opened the potions book that lay on the desk in front of him to the page titled 'liquid explosion'.

"It's payback time, dear brother," he chuckled to himself and set to work.

Unbeknownst to him, George was not alone in the quiet potions classroom. Peeves, who had intended to cause some trouble by knocking ingredient jars off the shelf, had silently entered through a wall at the back of the room. He watched as George found the page in the book and spoke to himself, then quickly left the room to find Fred; his favourite of all the Howarts students.

That night at dinner, George positioned himself opposite Fred, the little vial of potion tucked into his robes. The second phase of his plan, arranged over breakfast earlier that day, was about to be put into action. George looked down the table to his left and gave a small nod to one of the first year boys from last night, Kevin, who pulled a brightly coloured sweet from his pocket and popped it in his mouth. Immediately, his tongue began to swell again and startled cries surrounded him. Fred looked up from his plate of sausages to see what the disturbance was and quickly jumped out of his seat and ran to Kevin.

Whilst Fred was giving Kevin the antidote to the toffee for the second time, George pulled the vial from his pocket and poured a few drops over Fred's plate, knowing with a flick of his wand the thing would blow up in his face. He sat back and watched Kevin's tongue shrink back to its normal size and then Fred returning to his seat.

"Stupid first year," he said to Lee who was sitting next to him, "how he didn't recognise that sweet from yesterday is beyond me. Good job I still had the antidote on me."

He picked up his fork and stabbed a sausage with it and just as he lifted it to his mouth, George flicked his wand in the direction of Fred's plate. He braced himself for an explosion, but none came.

Fred took a large bite of his food then suddenly went rigid. His fork dropped with a clang and he fell back from his seat and on to the floor. Lee, who was closest to him, jumped from his own seat and lifted Fred's head from the floor, shaking him and shouting his name. George stared in shock, watching the scene unfold but glued to the spot, unable to move, unable to do or say anything. It wasn't until Professor McGonagall ran over to see what the fuss was that George found his voice.

"It was me, this is my fault! Oh, what have I done. It was supposed to be a joke Professor, I swear!"

"What was a joke? What is wrong with him?" She was kneeling on the floor now, waving her wand and murmuring incantations.

"I made a potion, an exploding one but it didn't go off when I waved my wand. He ate the food and collapsed," tears were forming in George's eyes now.

McGonagall opened her mouth to respond, but stopped when she noticed something Lee was doing.

"Mr Jordan! What was that, what did you just feed him?"

However, Lee did not have to answer, for Fred leapt up from the floor, grinning.

"Fainting fancies! My latest sweet invention! Eat half and you faint, have the other half and you're fit as a fiddle again!"

Lee applauded and Fred bowed, George gaped at them both, not quite understanding what was happening. McGonagall was furious.

"Can someone please explain what is going on?!"

"Well," Fred began, "Georgie here decided to play an awful trick on me. Thankfully Peeves found out and warned me. He saw George making the potion and heard him talking to Kevin about causing a distraction at dinner. So after George put the potion on my dinner, Lee swapped mine for his whilst he was watching Kevin's tongue shrink. He hid a fainting fancy in one of the sausages so I ate it and fainted."

"You...I...How-" George stammered.

McGonagall cut across him, "Mr Weasley that was a cruel trick to play on your brother-"

"Hang on, are you talking to me or George?" Fred asked.

"You...George...Both of you! George, I expected better from you, a prefect. Fred, I, well this is exactly what I would have expected from you but I am nonetheless disappointed. Both of you will receive detentions." She looked around at the hall full of students, "as you were please."

George slumped back into his seat, devastated at the receipt of his first ever detention. Fred resumed his sea opposite, piling a new plate full of food and grinning at his brother.

"Totally worth the detention. Try harder next time Georgie!"


End file.
